Portway prepares for US Open Qualifier with 43 points!
The sun shone hot and long at Walton Heath as 15 creamed-up PwC LEGS members braved the famous 6,300 yard New Course that was in excellent condition, having been prepared for the US Open Qualifier the following week… The greens themselves were very fast and difficult (for some) to read. The biggest challenge for all was the sheer quantity of ‘Small’ (Heather) on every hole – and many a ball was lost to the purple abyss…
The clubhouse gardens were a blaze of colour in the sun with azaleas and camellias in full bloom (talk about painting pictures with words - what a creative author this editor is!) and it was an effort to leave the comfort of the lounge following excellent full English breakfasts that were effectively and efficiently dispatched… Amazingly Mark Bignell was served last, though he didn’t make any fuss (yeah right…).
Clearly this affected him on the course as Mark ‘Aving a Mare’ Bignell drove with great distance off the tees but sadly had trouble keeping his balls on the fairway – though did find a number of adjacent fairways. On the positive side he met lots of other golfers throughout the day coming the other way…
Shaun Bookham proudly wore his brand new ‘Chelsea – Premier League Champions 2017’ t-shirt for all to see – presumably replacing his ‘Chelsea – Premier League 9th 2016’ t-shirt of last year…
Donald Allan unfortunately broke his club on the course and confused all by keeping his umbrella up throughout his round, presumably because either A) coming from the other side of the wall, he always expects rain or B) to ensure his delicate Scottish light blue skin didn’t frazzle under the scorching sun…
Donald also caused concern early on when he was spotted coming out of the Pro Shop feeling dizzy and looking ashen-faced. An ambulance was about to be called when it was discovered that his shaking condition was merely a violent reaction to having been charged £11 for a Shot Saver booklet and driving range token…
Onto the golf, the NTPs were won by John Capstick (two) and by Shaun Bookham. The ‘NTP in two’ on the 9th was incredibly tough and James Clare took some stick when it was thought he had selected the hole, only for him to be forgiven when he confessed that it was the Pro who had suggested it… The prize will rollover to the next match.
Nigel Halliwell won the Front 9 with 19 points and Steve Wooten won the Back 9 with 18 points. It was then discovered that Mark had made a mistake and John Capstick should’ve won the Back 9 but as he’d already won two NTPs he graciously let Steve take his prize.
Cream of the crop went to Terry ’21.6 but not for long’ Portway who scored a very impressive 43 – yes, 43 –points… His car passenger John “Not ‘Avin’ It” was a tad gobsmacked by Terry’s score and a long and silent car journey home in Terry’s car would be his reward…
Respect where it’s due however – that was some round of golf!
Other prizes that could’ve been awarded included one for Pauline Morrow’s continued improvement with a score of 28 points, and another for Peter McBride for throwing a golf club the furthest in anger – approximately 40 metres I believe.
Congratulations to all the prize-winners - details below:
